The tears rolled as she tried to muster up enough strength to hold her shaking hands steady.
The lies he has told
about her jump right out of the screen at her, taunting her self worth.
Why would he do this?
She doesn't understand but she realizes understanding it will be of no concern to him because his mind is somewhere else and not with her.
She doesn't understand but she realizes understanding it will be of no concern to him because his mind is somewhere else and not with her.
Standing in front of the
mirror she looks long and hard and in her own mind tells herself she
sees why he wants another for she is ugly, fat, disgusting to look at.
Little did she know it was mind play on her own part.
Surely it had NOTHING to
do with any of those things but rather had EVERYTHING to do with his own
lack of self worth. HE had to convince himself that he is worth
something to others, even if it meant lying to himself and everyone
around him to know it.
Homeless at this point
she sits at the Ohio River with her son and daughter-in-law wondering
how this could possibly now be her life now. Knowing that tomorrow she
would be standing in a food pantry begging for food and sobbing from the
humiliation of it, and knowing he is but a mere 2 miles away, in her
bed, on her sheets with another.
She was lost and sitting
at the very spot where his son was dragged out of the deep, dark,
twisting river, dead at 19 years old 2 years earlier. He had no remorse,
no care about those the river seemed to grasp. How many lives must
drown before he feels complete?
Over the course of the
last 3 years she had learned a lot about herself, about him, about who
her true friends are, and about the woman who walked away with what she
thought was her life. She would conclude that her injustice would be her
blessing in the end.
Confident, healthier,
self employed, free, loved by family, and friends she treks forward in
life with a smile, thankful for the life she has, and thankful for that
life she lost and those people in it.
She has witnessed his
misery over the last few years, as well as watched the other woman fail
miserably in not only her relationship with him, but in her own
financial status, and even as a mother of the unborn child she chose to
destroy before birth.
I thank You Lord for what
You have done for me and my family. For bringing us where we are today
and keeping Your hand on us every second of everyday. I thank You Lord
for laying out the map of my life and urging me to follow it.
For removing those
people, places and things from my life so that i could live. For showing
me that the river wasn't there to hurt us, but rather to clean him out
of our lives forever.
Written by: Belinda Taylor 7-9-13
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