The Demons Within

The title asks the question, so what is the answer? The demons we face in life do at times very much define who we are.

I can say i am not afraid to die but that would be a lie. Why? because i don't want to leave my family...

This fear, is it a demon within? Sure feels like it when the very thought of it causes you to catch your breath. It is dark and scary, and threatens everything we know as safe and content.

We are all susceptible to having that safety net ripped right out from under us. Leaving us to hang, dangling from high above, scared to believe when we hear," let go, i will catch you"!

Do we cling to the hope we will survive this God awful fall? This leap of faith? To place our lives in the hands of another in itself is like asking for whatever the moment holds for us in the mind of the person offering us the hope of being saved. Right?

Sometimes we need to sit and think about our lives and what we have done with it. Did we benefit anyone else? Or did we just become selfish and greedy? Walk on others before they can walk on us? Isn't that a demon in and of itself?

Why is it that bad things happen to good people? Why must the good always sacrifice while the demons of the world prevail, and prosper, and continue to feed off the needs, desires, weaknesses of others? Surely humans aren't predatory by nature. Are we?

Can we control our destiny? Our fate? I think to a certain degree we can. I mean, if i get hit by a bus crossing the street then was that my fate. Maybe, but if i hadn't crossed that particular street then i could have avoided that bus. Right? So in a way, i created my own fate. Or did i?

Was it the demon within that made me take the quickest crossing, throwing regard to the wind? Maybe i should have waited for the better alternative. But then why should i? This way is faster, easier and i am too lazy to go the long way round...

Close our hearts? Close our minds? Wait to die? Not this girl! This girl will fight hell and high water to survive because the demons can't have me. They can't lie to me anymore. They cannot steal my happiness and reduce me to nothing but a quivering mess on the floor of life. Love me, accept me, keep me, care for me, or leave me be...

Written by Belinda Taylor 8-2-13

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